as said previously...life marches on...straight off a cliff

ok...i get to rant now...because i have a great subject on which to do it. as my poem in the last post said, "hope dies"...and truly it has. its just happened too many times now, and everytime i try to resurrect that hope it just gets sliced up again. i just dont get it. the one girl that has everything i consider to be just plain fucking great finds a boyfriend...which im not really mad at all...its her life, she gets to pick what she wants. i, however, just wasnt what she wanted. i can accept that. after all shes liked him for like 3 years...i on the other hand...probably...6 months at the most...or least..i dont know. certainly less than 3 years. people say that everyone finds someone....which in most cases is true, but for me...it seems that i can FIND someone, but when it comes to actually "hooking" that person i fail so miserably that it discourages me from ever even trying again. but seeing as i very rarely give up i just keep pounding the virtual pavement on whatever thing thats new...xanga...myspace (to an extent)....whatever else. my trust in meeting people through friends has been badly shaken. madison knows. it was basically the same principle there too, her and her current boyfriend had had a fight or some shit and they were on a break i guess you could say. and just when i think its going well, they patch things up. its ok though, she wasnt really my type anyways. you all see where im going with this. im a complete and total failure at love. plainly and simply. i mean well but theres some fundamental flaw about me. God knows what that is. because i sure as hell dont. well thats all i really feel like saying.

--Goodnight