textual posts are like...so last night

this new audioblogger thing is great. technology is amazing isnt it? ive audio-posted twice in one day so im good for at least 24 hours. but! i have some things on my mind that i want to rant about...
-Love Lives-(plural of life, not like alive)
i am constantly in the presence of couples. school, home, limited social life...now dont get me wrong, i love you guys(not anyone in particular)...i really do, but im not couple bashing here im just explaining my position on love and how it relates to me. it really doesnt to be very honest...i had my shot at it, blew it, was fine for a while...even had someone else in mind, fucked that up horribly, suffered for about 3 and a half months....and here i am once again wondering when that glorious halo of light appears around another girls head. when that will happen, i dont know...will it happen at all? who knows. i think about it pretty much every day when i check the xanga metro for some prospective lovers...and every day is a disappointment. i know that nothing is new. nothing has changed except that someone has updated. i dont know why i do it, its like instinct now more than anything. like when a dog hears a bell and relates it to food being available...much like me in the same way, except im not a dog obviously. i mean, as of right now this whole endeavor seems pointless, hopeless, and fruitless above all else. i cannot find anyone that meets my standards. which if you were wondering are: Short, very good looking, intelligent, loves the same music as me, gets along with madison(because if they cant get along with her then screw that, shes my sister for goodness sake!), can take a joke, absolutely will not cheat for any reason, non-smoker..non-drug abuser, etc. etc. ,, i think you get the idea yeah? but that certain female is the most elusive thing since the chupacabra or any other slightly mythical creature. only once in a great while will i even get a glance at this magnificent being, my perfect mate, the one if you will. i thought i had that pinned down but, apparently not...so i continue that near impossible hunt for that one person. i know it will not be easy but its basically essential for me to have someone that loves me and i can love them in return...because ive tasted it once, and i crave it once again.

--goodnight